A single word to accurately describe the overwhelming joy, happiness, pride, and humility to the point of tears I felt may not exist. I'll just call that emotion 'everything'. She couldn't have said anything more meaningful to me than that even if she tried.
Katie has a way of making my heart softer, my patience greater, and my laughter louder. I've practically convinced myself that I won't live long enough to see her be a young woman so I'm enjoying every second of being her dad and making these little moments last as long as possible. Fear of death isn't the way I live but I'd be lying if I said my expiration date isn't something I'm wondering about.
When I became a dad (again) at 42, I felt a little selfish for bringing a child into my world when I knew I wouldn't see every important moment of her life. When you stop and think about it, how can anyone see everything? As smart as I think I am, I still felt like I'd see all her moments that make life worth living. It's an impossible task for sure so perhaps I'm just going to try to be more realistic and simply appreciate what I'm here to experience and witness.
Life is mostly unpredictable and some events will eventually knock us all off the path we're on. You can try to figure out how you're going to get to your destination no matter the circumstances or you can just enjoy the journey with all the unplanned side trips you take along the way. My Buddy is not one of those excursions though. To think of her or her sisters as anything other than a dream come true would be inaccurate and dishonest. They're my world and I always wanted to be a dad. I am blessed to still be on the path even into my AARP years. (Yea, discounts!)
Katie's sweet little face and countless freckles remind me every day that she came into my life when I didn't know that I needed her in it. Yesterday morning she said she likes my laugh and without any question, I dig hers too. She always makes me smile too. :)
